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Week of March 13, 2006

You can take "The Peacemaker," "Deep Impact," and "The Tuxedo." We'll take "Gladiator," "American Beauty" and anything else that didn't suck.

Emilio's 17

Yeah, like he needed all that overpriced crap anyway...

This lawsuit's going to make 'House Party' look like 'House Party Two!'

I told you... don't call me SENIOR!!

Maybe this is all a bad dream too?

Thanks Sharon, but I think I'll wait until this one comes out on DVD (so I can freeze frame of course)

There is absolutely, positively no nepotism in Hollywood. None.

You're good, baby, I'll give you that... but me? I'm magic.

This band will go down like a lead balloon

Well, Goodbye there Children...

They can't sell the Capitol Records building! What will be left to destroy in the next crappy 'end of the world' movie?

Same old Courtney - still sponging off Kurt

Panic on the streets of Austin

You're a fat, Botox faced, wig-wearing ninny! Oh yeah? Well your band has a dirty H addict as a lead singer!

Black Sabbath, Blondie, Miles Davis, The Sex Pistols, Lynyrd Skynyrd Enter Rock Hall



01 THE BREAK-UP $39.17
$12759/av

02 X-MEN: THE LAST STAND $34.02
$9159/av

03 OVER THE HEDGE $20.65
$5170/avg

04 THE DAVINCI CODE $18.61
$4953/avg

05 MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE III $4.68
$1756/avg

06 POSEIDON $3.49
$1283/avg

07 RV $3.20
$1469/avg

08 SEE NO EVIL $2.04
$1607/avg

09 AN INCONVENIENT TRUTH $1.36
$17615/avg

10 JUST MY LUCK $855K
$892/avg









E-MAIL THE AUTHOR

GAME ON!

By Ian Bonds

June 17th, 2005

As many of you know, the newest entry into the Batman film franchise opened on Wednesday, BATMAN BEGINS. As I usually like to do when there’s a tie-in like this, here at Game On!, we’re going to take a look at the games that feature the film’s titular hero, including the newest one, featuring the plot of the film. There’s a bit of a warning here, however. Seeing as there are so many different kinds of Batman games, and how, honestly, the majority of them suck; we’ll be separating these games into different categories, just to keep everything straight. Not all games in their respective categories will have the same rating, but it will keep the many different styles of games separate at least. We’ll close the whole column up with the review of the newest game.

First up, of course, we’ll start with what started the Dark Knight’s adventures in video games…the films. Strangely enough, for a character that had been around for so long, his first foray into video game territory came when he made his big screen debut in 1989’s BATMAN film, starring Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson. Sadly this game, and the four that follow, are all fairly similar in theme, tone and execution. And that’s not a good thing.

Batman – 1989 – NES, GENESIS, GAMEBOY

Batman Returns – 1992 - NES, GENESIS, SNES, GAMEBOY, GAME GEAR, ATARI LYNX, SEGA CD

The first two games based on the first two films are probably the best of the initial four film based games. However, they really don’t come much more basic than this. Using the same side scrolling gameplay style, you (as Batman, of course) fought through similarly structured stages fighting oddly garbed badguys using batarangs and your general fighting prowess.

The games were your typical action side scrolling affair. Walk to the end of the level,
fighting all the goons you come across, defeat the level boss, and repeat. There wasn’t much to them at all. The graphics at least retained the dark look of the films, though the audio was questionable with some of the music choices (especially in the Genesis version of BATMAN RETURNS).

Overall, though, they weren’t horrendous, though the second film game did have a good bit of questionable jumping areas, only hindered further by Batman’s bizarre grappling hook jump.

One Gamer’s Opinion: (both games, all formats)

Batman Forever – 1995 – SNES, GENESIS, GAMEBOY, GAME GEAR

For the third film, the series found a new director, a new look, and sadly, the same old gameplay. While things shaped up a bit in the graphics department, the game was just as odd as nipples on a batsuit, as digitized actors replaced normal sprites in the game’s environments. Even stranger, it seems as though the game developers didn’t really pay too close attention to the film as a reference point, as some of the costumes didn’t quite match up (seriously, there’s not THAT much green in Robin’s outfit…but at least the nipples aren’t noticeable).

Even stranger is the fact that the game didn’t really bother following the film’s plot at all. Robin was playable right from the very start, and you basically went through some basic drab-looking scenery, battling digitized actors playing escaped inmates or characters from the film, and most of them being the same actor, just with a palette swatch on their
outfits, to “change things up”. It was a side scrolling fighting game, sort of like MORTAL KOMBAT, only you kept walking to the right after defeating a combatant. At least there was a two player co-op and versus mode, but it really didn’t add to the game at all, just made you wonder why you were spending moments playing it.

There was a version of the game released in the arcades and on PSOne and Sega Saturn (overseas only) as well that was more of a traditional one-on-one fighting game, but it never made consoles stateside.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Batman & Robin – 1998 - PSOne

The fourth and final film (and worst) is also (not ironically at all) one of the worst BATMAN games around. Here, now that we’re on the “cutting edge” of technology, we have BATMAN in glorious 3D…all except the “glorious” part.

The game sticks you as either Batman, Robin or...ugh, Alicia Silverstone’s Batgirl in a fully 3D environment where you have to use your detective skills to stop Mr. Freeze’s plot to encase all of Gotham in a world of ice. Sadly, the character’s move with the same stiff-backed performance the actors give in the film, and the control is so twitchy and clunky that you’re not even sure what you should be doing half of the time.

The combat is built on a toggle switch system, so if you want to fight, you have to press the fight button before you can punch a baddy. Half the time you’re quickly slamming on the fight toggle, trying desperately to flog the nearest goon, all the while suffering through trying to turn to face them in the first place. Analog movement had not yet
reached the standard it is today for this game, and it showed then even as it shows now.

What’s worse is that despite being so late in the PSOne’s title cycle, it looks almost like a first generation PSOne game. The graphics, while retaining at least a modicum of similarities to the films characters, are still so blocky and annoying that there are times when the costumed heroes blend in with the dark and drab backgrounds. The detective stuff, while fun when you can get it to work, took too long to get to work, so you really wouldn’t know it anyway. Bottom line, much like the film, avoid unless you’re trying to complete the set.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

So, with a crappy standing of the films, you’d think game makers would go to where the character began, the comics, right? Sadly, for all the iterations of Batman in video game form, there have only been TWO games based directly (or so they claim) on the comic books (well, okay, THREE, but it’s hard enough to track down a Commodore 64, let alone any games for it).

Batman: Return of the Joker – 1992 – NES, GAMEBOY

Batman: Revenge of the Joker – 1992 – GENESIS

Despite the slight variation in their titles, these two games are in essence the same thing. Picking up, in a way, from the end of the last film, the boxes to these games gave a slightly incorrect view of what was contained within. Using a comic art style, fans picked up the game hoping it to be based on the comics, and while the style of the game could be thought of as such, the costume on the hero (in the NES version at least) resembled its film counterpart more than most would have liked. This was compounded by the fact that when this game was released in Japan, and the second film game came out later in the year, the film game was referred to as BATMAN III rather than BATMAN RETURNS.

So, anyway, the game: The Joker has returned, and wants his revenge on Gotham City and Batman (thus combining the two titles of the games) and it’s up to you as the big black bat to stop him and his henchmen. The gameplay remains the same as the initial BATMAN game, as a side scrolling action title, using fisticuffs and batarangs to dish out your own style of vigilante justice. The odd thing is, while gameplay is essentially the
same for both NES and Genesis versions of the game, it’s just better on NES all around.

The graphics look sharper, the character sprites are more detailed, and the hit detection is better too. In the Genesis version, you die bizarrely for no reason other than badly timed jumps, or unrelenting enemy fire. And while it is a basic side scrolling adventure, there is again not much else to it, in either version. The box is totally misleading when you see it, and when you play it, it’s more like BATMAN: THE MOVIE: THE LOST LEVELS. Comic based indeed.

One Gamer’s Opinion: (NES)

One Gamer’s Opinion: (Genesis)

Batman: Dark Tomorrow – 2003 – GAMECUBE, XBOX

The only other title based on the comic books is sadly the very worst Batman game EVER. What should have been a stellar title to utilize Batman and all his cool gadgets was nothing more than a herky jerky convoluted mess.

The game, which even comes with a mini Batman comic book, tries desperately to be something it’s not: a game worth playing. There are moments in the game, right at the beginning no less, where you have NO IDEA what to do. The instruction manual is useless, as it doesn’t tell you the basics you need for controlling your hero, and only through trial and error (and repeated leaps to your ultimate doom) can you find the proper
way to use your bat grapple. Combat is even worse, with Batman spinning wildly on his feet to face his foes (alliteration is the only cool thing about this game) and button mashing is the only real thing that saves you in the end.

The game has such horrible controls that it’s basically unplayable. You just try to swing across rooftop to rooftop in the opening and see how long YOU play for. My mind went numb within the first three minutes.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

So with colossal busts like that, what are we left with? Why, games based on the Batman Animated series, of course! For a cartoon, I always considered this to be the most accurate representation of the character from the comics, and the majority of the games showcase the art style as well as the character traits we love so well.

The Adventures of Batman and Robin – 1994 – SNES

Believe it or not, but four completely different games share this title, and they were all released within a few months of each other. While they all hold the same theme of the animated series, and while the first three are side scrollers, that’s just about where the similarities end.

The SNES version, developed and published by Konami, is the best of the bunch, featuring larger, more detailed character sprites, and a better handle on the gameplay. It’s your standard side scrolling beat ‘em up, but the action is face paced and never tiresome. There really isn’t a plot present, per se, just various stages based on episodes of the animated series. That’s not necessarily a bad thing at all, and everything flows well, and the action is just one of total fun.

One Gamer’s Opinion: (SNES)

The Adventures of Batman and Robin – 1995 – GENESIS, GAME GEAR, SEGA CD

The Genesis and Game Gear versions however, developed by Clockwork Tortoise and published by Sega, are another matter altogether. These games feature completely different level design, and a plot that, while not really at the forefront, center around stopping Mr. Freeze from turning Gotham into an ice cube. While they too are also side
scrolling beat ‘em ups, these titles sadly resort to more button mashing than actual strategy, and the gameplay becomes tedious and monotonous all too quickly.

The graphics for these titles are also at a loss. The character sprites are not nearly as detailed (or as large) as the SNES version, and you can tell that despite the titles, these are two totally different games. But never is that idea more present than in the last game to share this title.

One Gamer’s Opinion: (both Genesis and Game Gear versions)

The Sega CD version of THE ADVENTURES OF BATMAN AND ROBIN is a bit of a weird game. Using the storage capacity of the CD, there are actual scenes from the TV show on the disc, and gameplay is built around these scenes. The gameplay consists of, not side scrolling action, but DRIVING sequences. As the player, you pilot the Batmobile (or Batplane, or Batboat, as the case may be) and chase down crime all over the city. The best part of the game is the TV cut-scenes, and while the gameplay is something new, it’s really not all that exciting. Strangely enough, however, this format for a game will be visited again later on, to yet another varying degree.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker – 2000 – N64, PSONE, GAMEBOY COLOR

First, however, we take a diversion with the Batman of the Future. BATMAN BEYOND: RETURN OF THE JOKER attempts to tie-in with the direct-to video animated feature of the same name and get kids to play as the high-tech version of the Dark Knight. Sadly, this is not something ANYONE should do, at least with this game.

While this game isn’t nearly as awful as, say, BATMAN & ROBIN, or even BATMAN DARK TOMORROW (though thankfully, not much is), it is still pretty much crap. Poor looking character sprites, minimal animations and clunky controls make this just a button mashing bore-fest. The PSOne version doesn’t even feature clips from the movie, just stills with text scrolling underneath. They couldn’t even get voice actors? The game from start to finish seems like a quick cheap way to make a quick cheap buck, and sadly, that’s all it is. You’d be better off playing with pocket lint.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Batman: Gotham City Racer – 2001 – PSONE

By now the TV cartoon has gone through a few changes, first appearing as “Batman: The Animated Series”, then “The Adventures of Batman and Robin”, and now to “The New Batman Adventures”, where the former Robin is now Nightwing, we have the younger Tim Drake Robin, and Batgirl is along for the fun. Taking a cue from the Sega CD game based on the animated series, this title goes for more of the same: driving sequences book ended by clips from the TV show for plot. But thankfully, there’s a bit more substance here.

Firstly, other than the main story mode, you can actually select whom to play as, be it the Dark Knight himself, his former ward Nightwing or the mysterious Batgirl, as well as 12 different villains for a mode called Patrol. Here you can either stop robberies as the “hero”, or partake in them as a “villain” (and participating in a robbery consists of, well, just waiting outside while the money racks up…this is really all just a driving game). Then there’s the fact that there’re a good bit of multiplayer options, where one player acts as the “hero” and the other is the “villain”, and you each must shoot the crap out of each other to win. Fairly standard stuff.

As I said, the main story mode is told through scenes from the TV series, and everything cuts together fairly well. The graphics are decent, though the Batmobile is a bit more angular than necessary. Still, it is a PSOne game, and the control is fairly decent (again, no totally analog, but passable) and the overall execution is fun, so there’s not too much to complain about here. For a change.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Batman: Vengeance – 2001 – PS2, GAMECUBE, XBOX, GAMEBOY ADVANCE

Now THIS is more like it. Here we finally get to take control of the Dark Knight and all his “wonderful toys”. While previous games have implemented some of his more colorful gadgets in action, this is the first title to actually give each their own practical use (which BATMAN: DARK TOMORROW attempted to recreate with little to no success).

With stellar control, excellent graphics and even a cape with its own AI, this is the first Batman game worthy of the license. The plot is just about as varied as the other games based on the animated series in that they are a series of missions featuring Bats’ Rogues Gallery of villains. The gameplay however, borrows heavily from several styles, including platforming, fighting, and even a little FPS action (generally when using gadgets and batarangs).

Granted, the mix of these elements isn’t perfect, but it is good enough for fans of the series to recognize what’s going on, and the simplicity of the button layout makes getting a hold of your situation (whether it be battling or getting from point A on the ground to
point B in the sky) easier than most previous attempts for this character. The cut-scenes are all 3D rendered versions of the animated series’ style, and feature brand new voice work from the show (finally!).

I have to say that this is probably my one of my favorite BATMAN games. It’s fairly intuitive as far as control is concerned, it looks and sounds great, and you finally get the feeling of playing as Batman, rather than just punching and kicking as a guy in his suit, or even just joyriding in his car. Here, you finally ARE Batman. You ARE Vengeance. You are the Knight. And I am happy.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Batman: Rise of Sin Tzu – 2003 – PS2, GAMECUBE, XBOX, GAMEBOY ADVANCE

Sadly, all that coolness went out the door with the last game to feature the animated style, RISE OF SIN TZU. I reviewed this title when it was released, and even then, I wasn’t nearly as happy with it as I was hoping. The game starts out good in theory, but ends up like all the rest.

Here, forgoing the normal side scrolling beat ‘em up style of the majority of the Batman games, we switch to a pseudo top-down beat ‘em up, along the lines of GAUNTLET. Then it’s just the same ol’ button mashing glee. Walk to an enemy, press wildly on the controller, defeat, and repeat. There’s a combo system at work, but none of the special moves you can perform act any more powerful than the regular moves, so it’s not really
of much point to use them (other than the “power moves” you can charge for a slightly stronger one-off attack).

You’d think with a brand new villain (created by comic artist Jim Lee) and a story by the guy who brought us FINAL FANTASY (the movie…oh wait) we’d have something more substantial. Well, nope, all we have is a silly little beat ‘em up. Sure, there’s two player action, but it doesn’t really matter. It’s yet another game that any hero could have been attached to, so there in the mediocre pile it goes.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

There are also two other games based on the animated series, BATMAN ANIMATED and BATMAN: CHAOS IN GOTHAM, both for GameBoy Color, but I was never able to locate them.

THE END IS THE BEGINNING IS THE END

So what does this leave us with? Well, seeing as there’s a new movie out, naturally, there’s a game to tie-in with it. This brings us (finally) to BATMAN BEGINS, out now for PS2, Xbox, Gamecube and GameBoy Advance. Here, we go to the beginning of the tale of the Dark Knight, with his origin and training, and how he became the vigilante do-gooder and detective we all know and love.

The game doesn’t really spend too much time on the origin, it leaves that to the film. What it does do, however, is recreate some of the film’s more exciting action sequences, and quite well too, I may add. Taking a cue from BATMAN: VENGEANCE, adding a dash of SPLINTER CELL and mixing it together with an old PSOne title called FEAR EFFECT, and you’ve got the basic idea here. As Bats (and occasionally Bruce Wayne), you skulk about the city, dishing out justice on the lowlifes of Gotham. But it’s not all straight go-in-and-pound-‘em stuff. Here’s there’s a bit of strategy and stealth involved (remember the SPLINTER CELL mention?) as you sneak around in the shadows to listen in on your foes conversations for some detective work, and even beat a few interrogations out of the one’s you let stay conscious.

Batman has a few gadgets to play with, even at this early stage in his career. He’s got an optic cable, useful for seeing what’s on the other side of doors. He’s got his grappling hook, for swinging out of danger in time, or just dropping in on a few baddies to gravelly say “hello”. He’s even got a few electronic hack devices that allow him to operate cranes and the like, to literally get the drop on his opponents. He certainly does have a good share of tricks, even for a beginner.

Still, evil is a weak minded and cowardly lot, and as the symbol of justice you must strike fear into the hearts of those who would bring pain to Gotham. To do so, the levels are built around the idea of an “area fear”. Basically, while you stay hidden, you can whip a batarang at a loose scaffolding and bring it tumbling down, scaring the baddies enough to crap their pants. With their guard down, you can pounce on them and take them out much easier than if their defenses were up and they still had a better grip on their guns. It’s an interesting method to Batman’s madness of justice, and serves to show that there’s more than one way into any given situation. Sometimes, sneaky is good.

When you have to get up close and personal, however, the controls don’t let you down. Punches and kicks flow easily, and Batman’s defensive maneuvers and counter attacks deal well with his adversaries. You can even hit your foes with a flash bang or smoke grenade, to further confuse and frighten them, making their defeat that much easier.

It’s not all stealth and scares, however. There’s some honest to goodness driving here as well, and taking a page from another game (this time from the crash-happy BURNOUT series) you pilot the ugliest Batmobile around, tearing into villains and crooked cops alike to keep Gotham save (and raise up property damage, oddly enough). These sequences resemble BURNOUT quite well (down to a slow-motion zoom on your defeated foes, as “Thug Takedown” appears at the top of the screen), but since the most recent BURNOUT was published by EA (who also published this title) I guess that’s ok.

These mixes of styles actually make this out to be the best BATMAN game yet. While the game can be a bit on the easy side (the only deaths you will incur are if you screw up and alert those with guns to your presence) due simply to the fact of the game's icon based hand holding (there's really not much thought involved with your actions sadly) it’s never-the-less the most fun you will have in the black tights (well, as Batman anyway…leave your personal lives out of this). There’re even unlockable interviews with the cast (who, with the exception of Gary Oldman, all return to voice their characters from the film…even Michael Caine), extra costumes, a “fear gallery” of the foes you’ve defeated, and a few extra racing modes separate from the game. Even if you haven’t seen the film, this game is worth picking, if only so you can get a feel for how a BATMAN game should be. Any one to come out after this one should know, the bar has now been set.

One Gamer’s Opinion:

Well, that FINALLY brings us to the end of this Game On! Extra. I don’t know about you, but I’m off to seethe movie. Until next time, friends.

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Addicted to Bad
by Patrick Keller

International Intrigue
by Alison Veneto

Nocturnal Admissions
by D.K. Holm

Strange Impersonation
by Kim Morgan

Trailer Park
by Christopher Stipp




New DVD Releases
for April 11, 2006

DVD Diatribe
by D.K. Holm

DVD Late Show
by Christopher Mills




Preachin' from the Longbox
by Britt Schramm

Should It Be a Movie?
by Marc Mason

New Comic Book Releases
for April 12, 2006, 2006




New CD Releases
for April 11, 2006

Music for the Masses
by M.C. Bell




TV Recommendations
Boob toob picks of the week by Chris Ryall

Kentucky Fried Rasslin'
by Scott Bowden

TV Pilot Review Archives
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