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I GOT ISSUES

By Ken Cuperus

August 21, 2002

HAIL TO THE KING, BABY

It's been twenty-five years now since Rock n' Roll lost one of it's greatest (and most imitated) legends. In honor of the event, people from trailer parks of all shapes and sizes have poured themselves into their Sunday-best jumpsuits, and combed the shake-n-bake out of their muttonchops to pay tribute to a man (nay, a veritable God!) who made dying on the crapper something to cherish. Foul-mouthed comic hipster LENNY BRUCE had set the trend a few years earlier, but it was Elvis who really took it and made it his own. (Notice how I've refrained from using a cheap "the King died on his Royal Throne" joke? Some things are just too sacred a subject...even for shallow ol' me.) I can't say I understand the phenomenon of celebrating the deaths of prominent celebrities. Sure, in their prime they were probably something special to behold, dazzling audiences from whatever branch of the entertainment tree they were known to swing...but now, after being dead and buried for so many years, I have to ask, "What have they done for me lately?" I don't mean to sound uncaring or callous, it's just that to all good things must come an end, and death is pretty much the trump card in that scenario. Hey, it's cool to continue to appreciate a body of work (movies, music...even comics!) but do we really need to continue to worship a body? (What do you get for someone who's been dead for 25 years anyway? He's so hard to shop for!)

However, in the spirit of the occasion, I dedicate this week's column to ELVIS, and his legion of hardcore fans around the World. Hey, any Dude who can get away with calling a movie involving hordes of beautiful, young, scantily-clad beach bunnies CLAMBAKE is okay in my books. (Oh, those wacky '60's!) Rest in peace, King! And if by chance you really are alive out there somewhere...quit Bogarting the fried peanut butter and Banana sandwiches, Man. They're supposed to be for everybody!

This seems as appropriate a column as any to pontificate on the subject of KINGS, within the World of comics. And I would never pass up an opportunity to pontificate! (or the opportunity to use the word 'pontificate,' for that matter.) Read on, my Royal subjects...read on...

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Lets start with BLACK PANTHER; King of Wakanda, and title character of what is consistently one of the smartest, funniest (and well-drawn) comic books on the rack every month. Writer CHRISTOPHER PRIEST has found a way to combine political intrigue and social satire with slapstick comedy and soap opera...the very strangest of bedfellows, and yet it works like a charm. Just one problem. Nobody is reading the book! In many eyes, BLACK PANTHER is considered a second-banana character and not worthy of a solo title, despite the consistent praise heaped on the book from most everyone who has actually bothered to pick it up and give it a chance. So what's the problem? (Well, I'm glad you asked.) The problem is that, although the book has been promoted quite heavily online, this is still a fairly new mass-media outlet, and isn't as common as we'd all like to think. All the online attention in the world won't turn things around. In order to reach the market majority, a more traditional campaign needs to be waged. Print press, promotional store posters, in-house advertising in stronger-selling titles, or even a cheap (free would be even better) monthly pamphlet give-away from the big companies that is designed to make the average layman aware of what they are missing out on. The internet has slowly become a crutch...a cost-cutting promotional tool that is only reaching a limited audience. It's time to stop looking for the easy out, and do some leg work for a change!

Remember a little book called MARVEL AGE? It was a monthly news/hype magazine that sold for a fraction of the price of a standard Marvel monthly. It was a fun read that kept the audience up on the goings on of their favorite creators and characters, while also promoting new titles, and big changes. In short, it was the perfect Marvel website...and you didn't even need a computer to scroll through the text! And it was accessible to everyone! (unlike trade magazines such as WIZARD that are priced out of reach of casual or budget-wary fans) So we have BLACK PANTHER, (nope, I didn't forget him...it all ties together, I promise) a title that everyone believes in, but isn't reaching a wide enough audience. So what can they do to try and change that? Why, relaunch of course! The same thing is happening with the new CAPTAIN MARVEL series. (only with a lot more whistles and bells!) The difference is that Black Panther is not relaunching with a new number one issue. Instead it's merely going through a change of art and tone starting with the 50th issue. (They are also keeping the specifics of the revamp under wraps, which I feel is another in a long line of gaffs associated with the promotion of this title.) So how do I even know about this big revamp? Easy...I surf the comic book news sites on the internet. So how do the more casual readers, or those without access to the internet (don't laugh, it's more common than you think) know about the revamp? Easy...they don't! So how is this going to help the struggling title find a new audience, and make readers who haven't been exposed to the internet hype aware of this little diamond in the rough? I think you probably all know the answer to this one, so feel free to say it with me... IT WON'T! And it's truly a shame. The bottom line here is that hype and promotion should go looking for their audience...not sit back and wait for their audience to come looking for them! Black Panther is prowling on the edge of extinction, and all the positive internet buzz in the world won't be enough to save it.

This isn't only a problem with Marvel, either...stronger non-internet related promotions are necessary across the board. And simply writing a short text piece for PREVIEWS MAGAZINE doesn't cut it. PREVIEWS is largely looked at as a retailers tool, and none but the most stalwart fans will actually buy a copy as a source of comic book information. Wouldn't it be a great exercise in industry wide unity, if all the big companies (including CrossGen...whatever you may think of them, it's time to face facts. They're here to stay) combined to release a low-budget news-magazine that promoted their wares. The kind of book that could be stacked on a retailer's counter, or near the growing trade program in a bookstore...to be given away for free with each purchase. Ahhhh...perchance to dream! Unfortunately, the cold hard reality is that the internet offers a cheap promotions tool, and tough titties to those few millions of readers who don't want to (or can't) serf around from site to site looking for it. Those lazy, old-fashioned Bastards! They don't deserve to know what changes are in store!

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Next up, I want to take a few moments to chat about DC's King of the Seas...AQUAMAN. Apparently he's back from his year long exile to God-knows-where, (I haven't been able to get through an entire issue of JOE KELLY's version of the JLA. It just feels off somehow...incomplete, like every second page of the story is missing) and will be receiving a brand spankin' new ongoing series this December. So what separates this new series from the ever-growing stack of previous failed Aquaman series? (What, you mean you haven't heard? Don't you have a computer, and hundreds of free hours to search comic-based web-sites?) Well, it would seem that RICK VEITCH is DC's catch-of-the-day, and has been brought in to captain the writing chores. I'm sure most of you that recognize the name, know the story of how Rick Veitch left his long, and critically acclaimed run on SWAMP THING over DC's refusal to print an issue that featured an appearance by JESUS. Neither side budged on their stance, and Veitch left the company as a result. Now, twenty-plus years later, the bad blood has thinned out enough for the new DC editorial to lure Rick back into the mainstream fold. And Aquaman fans can be sure that the character will be in very capable hands, once more.

But will even this be enough to right the ship on a character who has such a long history of failure? I, for one, hope so! Previous AQUAMAN-scribe PETER DAVID found some level of success with his lengthy run, and it wasn't until DC editorial interfered, causing David to leave, and ERIK LARSON to jump in feet first, that the audience dove for the life-boats in droves. After Larson bailed, Dan Jurgens barely had a chance to get his feet wet before the title sunk for good. (Okay, enough with the lame 'sea' references already, Sailor!) So the lesson here is...let the writer follow his vision, if the audience is willing to go along for the ride. If the readership is dropping consistently...okay, then Editorial may have some tough decisions to make. But if a series is healthy, and the creators want to try something a little different or new...for the love of God...LET THEM. Comic book readers are a loyal bunch, and if the powers-that-be mess up what they see as a good thing (such as the David AQUAMAN fiasco) the fans will leave. Period. If uber-popular scribe GRANT MORRISON was suddenly pulled off NEW X-MEN because the editors didn't like the idea of Beast being homosexual...then had him replaced with, say, JO DUFFY, you can be sure the fans would be outraged, and show their dissatisfaction by abandoning the title...despite Duffy's best efforts to please the readers with what may be great stories under different circumstances. (The difference being that the X-Men book would still have enough completists hanging around, to keep the numbers out of the cancellation zone. Do these guys even read their comics?) If you've entrusted a writer to shape and mold the adventures of a character (or team of characters) then be prepared to be taken to some unexpected places. Comic readers have grown more sophisticated over the years, and they can tell the difference between a writer's vision and editorial interference. It's jarring...It's unacceptable...and it damages our trust in the choices you've made. Hopefully the very talented Rick Veitch will have plenty of room to breath, and can recreate the Aquaman universe as he sees fit, without any hindrance from management. 'Cause we all know what happened the last time editorial pissed him off. And it would be a shame to see history repeat itself...for Rick Veitch, or for Aquaman!

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A column dedicated to Kings wouldn't be complete without a reference to the one true King of comics...the late, great, JACK KIRBY; A brilliant creator, and original icon of the silver age. (Who else could pull off DEVIL DINOSAUR?) I don't mind telling you that he was the Man responsible for the creation of my personal favorite character in comics, MISTER MIRACLE. (SCOTT FREE is also my favorite comic book 'civilian identity' name, if anyone cares) Yes, Jack Kirby will always be known as the King of Kings, but every King needs a successor, and I'd be interested to know which current creators you, the readers, feel would be a suitable candidate for the crown. Send me your thoughts and suggestions, and if your interest warrants it, I'll devote a future column to finding a worthy candidate based on your choices. The only rule is that the future reigning champion of the funnybook set must be currently involved with comic creations in some capacity. (and not necessarily just writing or drawing, either!) I look forward to hearing your response!

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Thanks everyone who sent me mail last week, and to show you that I've taken your suggestions to heart, I've decided to focus more on comic book commentary, and less on out-and-out humor pieces. The people have spoken, and I have fallen into line in an effort to please! So if you're wondering what happened to part 2 of the specialty store piece...well...lets just say it will probably emerge somewhere down the road, as the "I Got Issues" Lost Episode. In the meantime I hope you enjoy the new focus of the column. Then again, if you don't enjoy it, I'm sure you won't be shy about telling me, will you?

Also, a quick reminder that I will be hangin' out at the TORONTO COMIC BOOK EXPO from Fri. August 23 - Sun. August 25. You can find me at the NELVANA ANIMATION booth located in the Corporate section (near artist's alley, I'm told) promoting BEYBLADE and MEDABOTS (I'm a writer on both series) and scouting for new Canadian talent, with a yen for action/adventure style animation. Keep in mind that if you're interested in pimpin' your wares, you need to be a professional artist or writer, preferably with animation experience. Don't bring a sketchbook, without the resume to back it up. However if you just want to swing by and chat comics, I'd be glad to meet you...especially if you're buying the beer!

Well, that's it for this week, folks...Ken Cuperus has left the building. See ya in seven!

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